Today, I share a video on a conflict situation in The Amazing Race season 14. This case illustrates how a conflict arose probably due to team and self interests and also out of self defense and dignity. It highlights the quarrel between 2 teams, Margie & Luke and Keisha & Jen.
Video: The Amazing Race 14 - Conflict situation
The conflict sparked off when Luke shoved Jen away and she commented "bitch" in response to the physical act by Luke at the first clue box. Luke, being hearing-impaired, got livid after his mother, Margie, related the comment made about him. As both teams proceeded on to their next clue box, Jen retaliated and pushed Luke away while keeping him away from the clue box.
Let us focus on the later half of the video where Phil tried to mediate the situation. Harsh words were exchanged and both parties gave their side to the story. It was also seen that Luke wanted to exit the debate until he was called back by Phil. The atmosphere was intense and there was heightened tension that resulted from the Keisha's laugh, arguably about Luke's disability and Margie's racist lash back. My take is that it could be purely out of sheer eagerness to win their immediate competitors, and such occurrences of actions and emotions during the game may be inevitable. However, as it was not carefully handled thereafter, the situation had escalated into a major disagreement, which was broadcasted to a worldwide audience.
Do you think that the situation could have been handled differently given their positionalities as a mother, sister, contestant, man with hearing-impairness and a TV host. Could they have acted differently at the point or past the point of conflict?
Before I end off, I'd like to share an additional video on Kevin and Michael in 17th season of The Amazing Race. This is a really remarkable scene of mutual encouragement between father and son, broadcasted to a world-wide audience. Even though conflict may have existed in the form of frustration and disappointment towards self and his partner as they were unable to complete the race within the fastest possible, the duo has demonstrated that conflicts may be overcome with empathy and support. Have a good watch!
Video: The Amazing Race 17 - Team Jumba!
Wow!!! Thumbs up for your second post, Candice. You brought through a roller coaster ride of emotions through the videos. ]
ReplyDeleteWell, when a million dollars is at stake, there is bound to conflicts. I think it is human nature instinct for us to compete and survive. Therefore, I feel that the situation would not improve even they were granted a second chance. This is because many sees the winner as the one who walks away with the grand prize. Personally, I would also dub the one who displays sportsmanship in such competition as the winner. In order to achieve that, they should have exercised more self-awareness and not let their emotions get out of hand. If I were Jen, I would forgive Luke for shoving me. My reason is simple. Luke has been physically disabled since birth. People like him usually have lower self-esteem. Thus, this competition means much more for him than you and I. It is a platform since it is broadcasted on TV for him to shine and prove himself and show the world that physically disabled people are as capable and worthy as normal beings. I would not want to deprive him of that chance. He probably took great courage to attempt this competition. Thus, Jen should sympathize and empathize with him and readily forgive him on this eagerness to win. If she had done that, the scene with Phil would not have arisen.
For Keisha, she should adopt another response during tense situation. A smile or grin in such tension will usually be viewed as a display of sarcasm. What I would recommend her to do is to remain solemn like Phil and listen to what Luke has to say before making any response. Careful usage of body language is important in any conversation, especially important in this case since sign language is the only communication channel Luke has. Thus, Keisha should be more sensitive.
For Margie, it was definitely inappropriate to call Keisha and Jen the 'B' word. However, it was merely a reflex display of motherly love for her son. She watched Luke grew up with physical impairment and probably had encountered situations in which Luke was despised. Any parent would be heartbroken. "世上只有妈妈好，有妈的孩子像个宝。" Ever heard of this song? Therefore, I think Margie's reaction can be pardoned under the current social construct.
For the second video, I can only say "沙场不离父子兵，打虎不离亲兄弟。" Sorry for readers who do not understand mandarin but I find many Chinese idioms are able to illustrated a scenario better than sentences.
Haha thanks CK, you flatter me. It was just an appropriate video for the topic. Then again, I agree with you on the high stakes, hence high tension. Definitely, things could have taken another turn if the quarrel hadn't escalated due to constant provocation. Margie's love for her son was a tad extreme but understandable.
DeleteAnyway I applaud you for your aptly used Chinese idioms! Really like how it sums up a lot of things briefly, yet meaningfully. Cheers!
I am a fan of amazing race!!! Your videos does bring back old memories (:
ReplyDeleteAgree with Chee Kian on how both parties- Keisha and Margie could have handled the situation. For a competition like this that is ongoing for months, indeed conflicts can spark off easily. The stress that the contestants are facing, the lack of sleep and the need to constantly challenge themselves would have an effect on the contestant's emotions.
Under high stress situations, anyone would have snap and everyone makes mistakes too. Thus I feel that as a third party, we could remind ourselves to be more aware of our actions when faced with such situations as well as how we could handle it. We, however, are not here to criticize or pinpoint anyone. But rather, we are here to learn from the mistakes of others.
Love the second video! The video effectively shows that when conflicts arise, we still have the power to decide how are we going to act- blaming or throwing temper vs encouraging and considering others.
Thanks Candice for the great post! (:
Hahaha I'm a fan of it too! (catch it whenever I can ^^)
DeleteYes, the stress will definitely take a toll on their mental and physical health. Really insightful to point out that we are here to learn from their mistakes and not comment further (damage has been done anyway). And we definitely have a choice on how we want to handle a conflict. I feel that there's no right or wrong method, but I think we need to consider 天时，地理，人合 in adopting a conflict resolution strategy.
Thank you for your compliment Jo! Hope you enjoyed the read!
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ReplyDeleteYes, with such fierce competition, conflicts are bound to occur. However I do feel that at times, both parties should have handled the situation more appropriately.
ReplyDeleteI am not very approving of Margie (in the cab) trying to rub salt into the wound by telling Luke that he had been called a "bitch" by Keisha. She should have instead told him that it was wrong of him to elbow her and that he needed to calm down. It is understandable that Luke had every right to know that he has been called the B-word, but for the good of resolving the conflict, Margie should have just let the matter rest, after all Luke was the one who initiated the fight with his nudge.
I also noticed that when all the teams were gathered before Phil, Margie told Luke not to say anything, although clearly he was angry. It did not help that Keisha went on to say that all was not well and stuff, which then sparked off the heated argument towards the end of the video. I do applaud Margie's efforts to appease, perhaps Keisha should have acted more appropriately and reciprocated the the favour by keeping quiet and not make a fuss.
[Many a times, when dealing with conflict, we simply let our emotions get the better of us, such sour/ bitter grudges eat consume us from the inside like a virus. In my opinion, to enable us to resolve a conflict, one must be disciplined enough watch over his /her feelings.]
Thanks Candice for this excellent post.
Haha Alvin, you're a really observant person! Indeed, the points you have elaborated upon are definitely in some way or another, the 'triggers' to the conflict. Goading, lack of empathy and improper control of emotions are probably things that could have been controlled or done better.
DeleteThank you for flattering remark!
Woah.. i can see the intense anger within that crowd...
ReplyDeleteIn such competitions, where there is a huge price money, such scenes should be considered common is guess? Caught up in the heat of the moment, many people tend to rear their true self. In the case of Keisha, she was clearly lauding Luke's disability. And she made it worse by the obvious smirk...
However, Margie's action were in retaliation of her love for her son, as what Chee Kian said. Both sides have to practice restrain.
And great ending video! really enjoyed it!
haha, I guess that episode was really one of the 'highlights' of that season. I personally wouldn't agree with Keisha's untactful body language, and I do think that Margie really at fault for getting so heated up because it is definitely not easy raising a son with a physical deficiency. Really noble I must say.
DeleteGlad you enjoyed this week's post!